The Small, Daily Battles We Fight

The Small, Daily Battles We Fight

Diary of A Narcissist's Wife
I used to think that, over the course of the last decade, my self-respect was stolen from me (a little piece at a time), through repeatedly losing "the big battles", with my husband. I was convinced that my self-worth was destroyed in the unrelenting series of traumas, abandonment, and acts of gross neglect. I realize, now, that I didn't lose myself in those "big battles" (although, that was a part of it). Mostly, it was in losing- or, not even bothering to fight- the small, daily battles. (more…)
Read More

An Open Letter To My Narcissist Husband

Diary of A Narcissist's Wife
About 6 weeks ago, I came to you and admitted that my life with you, had become unbearable. I couldn't stand the abuse anymore. I couldn't take one more minute of watching you lay in bed- the iPad propped up on a pillow beside you- allowing yourself to be drawn in & completely consumed, for days at a time. Held captive by the siren song of an iPad, while your life crumbled all around you. A hapless sacrifice on the  Netflix, with her seductive siren's song,  while any attempt at communication with you resulted in the feeling that I had just been punched in the gut. I asked you if you cared at all about our family. I asked you if you cared at all about US. And, while I…
Read More

New Year’s & Narcissists: A Recipe for Disaster

Diary of A Narcissist's Wife
  happy 2016 to you! Did you have an amazing time, ringing in the New Year? Has 2016 started off with a bang for you? Is this going to be your best year ever? I sincerely hope that you had an awesome New Year's celebration, and that you are ready to make this year one of joy, prosperity, and love. As for me, well... I probably should have expected the year to get off on the wrong foot. After all, being married to a man with Narcissistic Personality Disorder pretty much ensures that all potentially happy days are scratched off the calendar.   My 2016 started off with a 9 AM text message from my husband, on the very first day of the shiny new year. He had spent all night out boozing…
Read More

Being a Narcissist’s Wife…

Diary of A Narcissist's Wife
It isn't easy...and it isn't easy to describe. Most of what passes between us, would be barely perceptible to any outside observer. It's a look, a wink, the length of the pause between words. Subtle, almost telepathic questions, and commands. But, then, maybe that's what makes it so powerful. So beautiful. So insidious. So exquisitely painful... The simple fact of the matter is that, all at once, I am his whole world, and his nothing. He loves me with a fierce emptiness, that relentlessly consumes all of me. Taking everything- leaving everything behind. He never looks back... not ever It's a dangerous game. A game I can never win, but one I dare not lose. The stakes are much, much too high. "For every gift, the gods demand a price. The greater the gift, the greater the…
Read More